The Kitts

I took the time to get to know someones heart tonight and I am glad I did. It's sad but we are all guilty of it, but we hear something about someone and we judge them based on what we hear but we never take the time to get to know that person. I sat here in my room tonight and watched this person worship God and I knew it was genuine and someone was cruel enough to make up all sorts of crap about this person and their walk with God. Who are they to speak anyway? I mean really. Who am I to speak even? I am just as guilty as the next I am sure of it. It's so sad but I know that we're all guilty of doing it. Seriously, take the time to get to know someone's heart. Love them for who they are and where they are. We've all screwed up and we're all gonna continue screwing up. Tonight I sat there listening to my friend play the guitar and I kept rereading this verse over and over again "There is not a righteous man on earth that does what is right and never sins." (Ecclesiastes 7:20) I meditated on this verse for awhile and I can't get it off my mind...we always sin. Simply put, we always sin. It's never gonna go away, not until one day I come face to face with my Savior and then finally I can be free of sin.

Last night I went over to Jeff's for a little worship session and I sat there and I felt so guilty for running from God all summer and I became so broken. I sat there and felt so unworthy and really empty and I realized how far I had ran and how God was calling me back and it was time for me to coming running into his arms again. How sweet is it that I get to fall in love with Him over and over again? Afterwards I sat here at home and thought about worship and if I really worshiped or not or if everything I put forth was just me singing because I knew the song.

Now what is it that you think I needed to hear this morning? So Dusty gets up to speak and his first question is "How would you define authentic worship?" then "What is worship not?" Wow, could this sermon seem any more perfect to me? Oh but it only got better. Key verse, Isaiah 29:13 "The Lord says: 'These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is made up only of rules taught by men.' " All summer that was me...I would draw near to him with my mouth & lips but my heart was nowhere near. Then Dusty said something which made me realize my worship was real this morning for the first time almost all summer and it's because this morning I longed to be fed, I longed to drink from the fountain. And Dusty said that worship is equally worthy to God when your drinking or longing for a drink from His fountain. And that we should pray to God "God I've drank from you before and I'm thirsty for you now."

Lessons learned: I may have been so far this summer but all that matter is that now I long to be closer to him. I shouldn't be down on myself just because I had a hard summer and I sinned and I ran from God because I sin, it's natural. And thankfully God has given me grace and it has set me free from that sin. Man God is so good to me even when I am so undeserving.